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Kavemank 03-17-2005 12:26 AM

Advice about Women [and snakes :)]
 
Hi all,
I am new to all of this. I have a friend that is very much addicted to corn snakes, so I thought I would look into it. I really like the looks of the candy cane and reverse okeetee morphs. My problem and where I need the advice is that my very soon to be wife is very against snakes, any of you guys got some advice on how to bring the ladies around?

p.s. if you could suggest some good breaders and when to expect some hatchlings for this year that would be good to. Thanks!

KatieL 03-17-2005 09:10 AM

Well, I'm not sure if this will help you, or not, but my mom and sisters all *hated* snakes the whole time I was growing up. After I got married and moved out Jeff and I got our first hatchling corn. Sienna turned out to be a big sweetheart, and never bolted or was even defensive at all. Well the first time my family "met" her, they loved her (much to my surprise). Turns out that a calm, pretty, little snake is a lot more lovable than the big scary mean one they were expecting. Now my [originally] most fearful sister asks to hold Sienna every time she comes to visit. Just be aware of their fears, and don't try to force anything on them...they were all more than willing to take the snake themselves after a few minutes of observing that she was well behaved with me. I don't know if this is true for all people, but my family was terrified of being bitten and once they realized that they weren't going to get bitten by Sienna they were okay with her. Also, I always get asked if she is venomous (or poisonous, ergh!) and most people are really surprised to find that she is not (do they think I am crazy?), and even more surprised to find out that she doesn't even have "fangs." Maybe try to find out exactly what it is about snakes that bothers your fiance and then work on putting those fears to rest.

Sorry this is so long winded, good luck!:)

peep_827 03-17-2005 09:32 AM

My hubby is the same way . . .
 
And I talked to him about getting Monty . . . he said okay. I brought my tiny little snake home in a deli cup and showed hubby and realized that he was less than thrilled. In fact he was downright scared! He told me that it's okay if I have a snake, however he wants nothing to do with it. :sidestep: More than a month later we have discussed several times the fact that Monty is not going to get big enough to really hurt us, Monty has no inclination to bite anyone, and even if he did he has no venom. Hubby is coming around slowly. He's actually gotten comfortable with sitting by me when I have Monty out and watches in fascination, tho he will not touch him. And he has actually agreed to me getting a g/f for Monty so that we can have baby snakes down the line. And the funniest part? He asked me where I plan to keep another snake and I told him I could keep it in a plastic box and he said NOOOOOO, if you get another it has to have it's own nice little habitat like Monty does (Monty lives in a 20 gallon aquarium). I was ROTFL. I outlined the costs for him but he insists that I spend the money for another tank. LOL

Perhaps you could work on educating your future wife on corns? They are very nice snakes and make great pets. Once she realizes that they are basically harmless and gets used to the idea she may come around. Take it slowly and see what happens. Actually I was surprised how many people were freaked out that I'd got a snake! But then again I still don't understand why anyone would want a pet tarantula!!! LOL :shrugs:

daisy 03-17-2005 09:38 AM

My hubby was dead set against having a snake....and still is. The compromise? Chester lives in a 20g aquarium in my office at work. It's a great set-up, cos now we are both happy. Your girl might not want a snake in her house, but theres no reason why you can't have one somewhere else :cool:
As for the breeders, this forum is full of good breeders. Just ask :wavey:

Godzilla2000 03-17-2005 10:01 AM

Well, this might sound strange being that I'm a lady and all, but I just cannot understand another woman's fear of Cornsnakes. I own three of them (With hopefully three Kingsnake babies coming in the near future as soon as I get the money together.) and they have shown to be the most docile creatures I've ever owned. I've had less troubkle with my snakes than I everhad with my supposedly cute and cuddly Hamster or Cockatiel. If anything, it's more terrifying when my hamster screeches like a banshee and flops on her back.

fergen8er 03-17-2005 11:07 AM

My soon to be wife has hated snakes as long as I've known her. We've grown up in West Texas were you can go out in the pastures and catch Western Diamondback Rattlesnakes nearly anytime of year. The people of this area seem to have a certain disdain for snakes, however I digress. She knew how much I wanted a snake and after long consideration she said she would buy me one for valentines day. I really wanted a ball python but she really hated the idea of feeding it bunnies later in life so she said that I could have a cornsnake (ain't that funny, I'm a grown man and I have to do what a women tells me to, lol). Anyways she really didn't want to touch it for a while or even look at it for that matter and the first time I had to feed it she got somewhat upset because "Mice are so much cuter than snakes" so she didn't watch. I feed live right now and the pinky made a little noise as my snake ate and that just upset her a little bit more. Five days later it was feeding time again and she went with me to get a pinky when we got back I had given it to my snake and left the room to go do something. I come back and my girlfriend is enthralled in watching him eat, I was amazed. She said it was really neat how far he could open his mouth and such. She said that she knew how much I loved my snake and that she would too. So I guess what I'm trying to say is that girls can come around, especially if they really care about you and know how much you care about your snake. So good luck with everything, and by the way I have a candycane and I love it.

CAV 03-17-2005 11:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fergen8er
ain't that funny, I'm a grown man and I have to do what a women tells me to, lol.

Brother, you've got A LOT to learn! ;)

Godzilla2000 03-17-2005 11:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fergen8er
My soon to be wife has hated snakes as long as I've known her. We've grown up in West Texas were you can go out in the pastures and catch Western Diamondback Rattlesnakes nearly anytime of year. The people of this area seem to have a certain disdain for snakes, however I digress. She knew how much I wanted a snake and after long consideration she said she would buy me one for valentines day. I really wanted a ball python but she really hated the idea of feeding it bunnies later in life so she said that I could have a cornsnake (ain't that funny, I'm a grown man and I have to do what a women tells me to, lol). Anyways she really didn't want to touch it for a while or even look at it for that matter and the first time I had to feed it she got somewhat upset because "Mice are so much cuter than snakes" so she didn't watch. I feed live right now and the pinky made a little noise as my snake ate and that just upset her a little bit more. Five days later it was feeding time again and she went with me to get a pinky when we got back I had given it to my snake and left the room to go do something. I come back and my girlfriend is enthralled in watching him eat, I was amazed. She said it was really neat how far he could open his mouth and such. She said that she knew how much I loved my snake and that she would too. So I guess what I'm trying to say is that girls can come around, especially if they really care about you and know how much you care about your snake. So good luck with everything, and by the way I have a candycane and I love it.


I like to feed my snakes frozen, dead pinkies. My Aztec Elle tends to shy away from live prey. It's funny because she'll poke her nose at the frozen pinkies just to make certain they're dead before she eats them. I'll have to get some movies of her doing this when I get a Digital Camera.

TrpnBils 03-17-2005 02:47 PM

It's sorta funny...whenever I got my snake a few weeks about a month ago, I knew none of my family would be real inclined to hold him. Most of them are still that way....except for my 75 year old grandmother - she was excited. I've also noticed something. At least here in Western PA, more guys seem to be afraid of snakes than the ladies, so that surprised me because I assumed I'd be having the same problem you're having...

But anyway, one of my friends did tell me that she was freaked out about it until she started thinking about it as "my pet" rather than "the big, bad snake." Hey, whatever works, right?

kathylove 03-19-2005 02:24 AM

It may seem like a roundabout method but...
 
over the years I have known several couples who started in herps with a husband who liked them and a wife who didn't. The common denominator in turning her interests around? He got her a pet leopard gecko or bearded dragon. After a while, she began to realize how much personality it had and how "cute" it was. Once she became hooked on lizards, it wasn't such a stretch to get her at least "semi" interested in snakes too. It may seem like a long way around, but I know it has worked a number of times.

Good luck!


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