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New Member Introductions Getting more and more new members here, so I think we need a forum for them to introduce themselves. You old timers can do the same, if you would like. |
Somewhat new member/Having issues with members
11-21-2011, 11:12 PM
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#11
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I think the biggest thing with us newbies, is we all need to learn how to use the search on the forum . Many questions have been asked twenty different ways already, and all have been answered twenty different times.
Now if I spend two days searching for an answer to a question or problem and I DON'T FIND IT, I then post it to get a fresh answer.
I also agree it gets annoying when people give newbies advice, and it becomes a dispute. Bottom line is, its advice take it or leave, don't cause a problem over it just because you don't like the recommendation being gave.
Over all I do think the majority of members try their best to be helpful.
If you had a few bad experiences posting (got nasty replies, etc) continue to post. Try, try again ... No question is dumb or bad. It's having a question and not asking it that is.
We are all here to learn, even someone in the hobby for 10years can still learn something new on here.
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11-21-2011, 11:30 PM
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#12
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I'm sure everyone will agree, I'm the queen of questions. Actually I need to use search vs just asking my questions.
I've never run into anyone rude here and I've asked too many questions to count.
I hope you don't leave b/c there are so many knowledgable people here. I finally became a paying member b/c I know I've learned well over $25 worth from this forum (and I like to be able to edit, lol!).
I too, agree that you never know how a person's tone is. That is one large problem with email, forums, etc.
This forum is also very enabling, so be aware!! I started out with 2 and I will have 9 when they all get shipped.
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11-22-2011, 01:34 AM
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#13
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So sorry that any of you have felt unwelcome in any threads, whether it was intentional or not. Please accept a big welcome from me, anyway!
I don't believe I have read any of the threads in question, so can't give an opinion as to whether I would consider them rude. I believe there is never any reason to be rude, and would personally rather stop posting if I am finding participation too irritating, but I do understand the frustration some members feel at times. As mentioned earlier, sometimes the same question is asked over and over, on an almost daily basis. I believe that it is not difficult to just politely suggest reading the FAQs, (or just not respond at all), but I guess some just have a lower irritability threshold than others, lol! And I can really understand frustration over somebody who asks for help but refuses to accept the answers, arguing continually to try to get the answer they really want instead of what has worked well for most of the members. Still, a polite referral to the FAQs, and then bowing out, would be a good solution, in my opinion. Of course I am not suggesting that the above applied to any of the threads in question - just suggesting that those scenarios do happen a lot.
I believe each long established forum has developed its own culture and community, and each is a little different than others. If you stay here long enough, and continue to participate without becoming defensive, and try to give the other member the benefit of the doubt when you think they may be a little sharper than you would like, I think you will very soon find that you are part of this community and will start to consider many of the people here your friends. Many of us have actually met in real life at various reptile shows or other outings. Some have even helped other members out when disaster struck. So please try to keep an open mind and heart, and give us some time before you decide whether or not this community is for you. Most people who stick it out for a few months find that they integrate very well into our group and become valued members.
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11-22-2011, 04:13 AM
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#14
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I remember one thread where I offered advice and just had someone replying with points which really didn't address what I was saying, so I gave up on it (having gone back today, I see that the eventual outcome was pretty much as I'd advised in the first place!). I can only offer advice in good faith based on my own experience, but if folks (newcomers or otherwise) decide not to take it, then that's entirely their privilege. After all, not 100% of what I say or know is going to be right. That's the point at which I try to bow out gracefully and leave the discussion to others.
Apologies if I've come across as a bit of a "know it all" or made anyone feel unwelcome as a result. I guess that can happen when - as Kathy says - you've had the same debate in slightly different forms, many times over several years of board membership.
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11-22-2011, 09:39 AM
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#15
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i dont care what most people say, there are some really haughty members on here. no, i wouldnt call it a majority, but enough have written in a condscending text for it to warrant my attention. and if someone gets the vibe theyre being disparaged, or talked down to, who are we to say what theyre feeling isnt true, or is wrong, or hast no merit?
ive gotten my share of infractions on here, some for sticking up for the little guy when he/shes being talked to in a way i dont feel is right. i hope new members oneday can come here and not fear mocking, condescending replies, or haughty attitudes. but on another hand, some of us are very close here, not in a cliquey kind of way either. i usually recommend the chat to newer members because its where ive met some of the nicest people on this forum (and that ive ever met), and theyre regulars in there.
just dont be too shy. knowledge is power, and most all of us here are just as capable minded as anyone else, and might one day be the ones giving advice to joe schmo, who once belittled us in text. and remember a lot of us on here do things our "own" way, so its helpful to take in advice from numerous sources, then make an assessment of your situation/question after considering the different views & opinions. what works for one person may not work for you in all circumstances. sorry about the long post! hope this helps some.
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11-22-2011, 09:49 AM
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#16
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I know I was in many of the OP's threads. I have gone back and reread all the threads and I don't see an area were I was direct to the point, condescending or just flat out rude. However, I know two people can read the same thing and take it two completely different ways. So I want to send out my apologies if I made you feel that way. I know you were talking to about us as a whole but I still want to offer my individual apology.
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11-22-2011, 10:10 AM
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#17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cmalchow
I know I was in many of the OP's threads. I have gone back and reread all the threads and I don't see an area were I was direct to the point, condescending or just flat out rude. However, I know two people can read the same thing and take it two completely different ways. So I want to send out my apologies if I made you feel that way. I know you were talking to about us as a whole but I still want to offer my individual apology.
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thats very sweet of you cmalchow. we need more people like you around here. and i know what you mean about 2 people taking the same thing differently. theres no room for inflection in text.
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11-22-2011, 10:39 AM
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#18
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I haven't been on very long, but I do see where some members will treat newbies rudely. For a long time I was afraid to post questions or try to help others. But there are so realy really really awesome people on this forum. I have met some that I know call my good friends!
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11-22-2011, 10:43 AM
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#19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by visceralrepulsion
i usually recommend the chat to newer members because its where ive met some of the nicest people on this forum (and that ive ever met), and theyre regulars in there.
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I totally agree with you on this Vis... It was in chat that I found the nicest people. They helped me with all my questions and didn't treat me like I was dumb when I didnt know something. I can now call them good friends!
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11-22-2011, 10:52 AM
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#20
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Read the thread "does this ball python look in bad shape" and you can see some of the rudeness.
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