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I need advice

A

Asher9

New member
Ok... so this is kind of a difficult topic for me but I need advice. I don't even know if this is in the correct section.

I have two corns. One is 10 years old and one is four. I have had them both for three years. I took great care of them for the first two years and then hit a rough patch with my life long battle with mental health and honestly wasn't taking care of them correctly. Now that I am better, I am feeling horrible about the way they were treated. Technically they were ok, I changed their bedding every month, I fed them every few weeks I gave them fresh water. But it wasn't as good as I usually do and I should have been feeding them and handling them more often. I know at some point I am going to hit another rough patch, and I don't want my snakes to have to suffer because of that. I love them both so SO much, but I am wondering, should I consider re homing them?

I'm sorry for the depressing post, but I am really desperate here.
 
I'm not going to pretend to be a snake expert or know what you're going through, but as far as I'm aware, snakes don't need (or sometimes even want) to be handled, they tolerate it, some better than others.

If you don't think that you are able to provide the level of care they need (food, water, suitable environment and clean the viv as required) then absolutely, look to have them re-homed to where they'll be looked after.

On the other hand, if you are still able to provide the food, environment and care required during your rough patch, then I see no reason why you should re-home them. If you do love them that much, maybe they'll be what helps you through the tough times and give you the push to get out of bed and clean the cage etc.

There are so many programmes around these days that use pets to help with mental health issues that I think it could be a good thing to keep them while you can, only you would know if you are capable of looking after them.

Best of luck with it and never be afraid of reaching out and asking for help.
 
First of all, hugs to you! I too have struggled with mental health from difficult life issues and abuse, and it is such a struggle, and I just have to encourage you, because it does get better! Never give up.

As for re homing, that's not necessarily your only or best option. As long as you feed them maybe every couple weeks, make sure they have a warm place in their tank, and change their bedding monthly, they will be okay. But if you think you can't do that for them, try reaching out to a friend or family member who would care for them temporarily when you feel like you can't.


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I am number 3 on this topic that also has metal health issues so I do know where you are coming from. True as long as you are still able too take care of them the right way such as feeding water clean cage. Then I don't see why you have too re home them at all! Take it one step at a time my friend. :)
 
Thank you everyone so much for your support and advice. I have some thinking to do on the subject but you really helped me out.
 
I just saw this post and want to add my best wishes. While I pride myself on my care of my snakes when I have a cold or other illness they do not get held and within reason feedings may be delayed a day or two. Only you can decide, but they can be re- acclimated to being held. As long as you can adequately meet basic needs through the rough patches I see no need to rehome. Wishing you all the best.
 
So sorry to hear of your struggles; I have significant physical problems as well as severe fatigue, and my ability to care for two snakes was a concern for me as well. Because of my problems, I handle my snakes every 2-3 days instead of every day as I would like, but they don't seem to mind. :)

On that note, I guess you should ask yourself what your goal is in owning snakes. If it is to have them be very social and tame, then frequent handling is a must. However, many owners are content simply to "have" them, and as long as you are able to feed, water, and change their bedding regularly, then they could care less if they are handled. If you find yourself unable to do the latter things, however, it is time to think about rehoming for their safety and health.

Hope that helps!
 
Don't the snakes, like pets in general, have a positive effect on your mental health? What if you bought a supply of frozen mice, and set a reminder to feed every two weeks. Would that help you keep things under control even when you weren't really at your best?
 
Another (former?) sufferer here. I would say that the majority have significant psychological issues at some point, but far too few feel able to bring it out fully into the open. I feel for you, I really do - particularly in respect of your fear of a future relapse. Hope you can take some comfort from the warm responses you are getting just in this thread from a number of anonymous strangers. Personally, I have found that although the world can often feel like a cold snd crazy place, there are in fact gazillions of people out there who do care and that they can come out of the woodwork for you when you least expect it.

I know all too well that everyone is affected by these things in very different and often complex ways. However, you clearly care very much for your snakes and so I assume that they give you some comfort and perhaps even some welcome distraction. As such, it seems it would be a shame to lose such a valuable benefit. If having animals in your life really helps you, then I would venture to suggest that snakes are one of if not THE best option for you. Personally, if you end up skipping a feed or two, I can't think there will be much harm done. I think sometimes we forget what these animals have to endure - and indeed are evolved to endure - in the wild. There is a line to be drawn of course, but personally I think the description of your cards shortcomings fall significantly short of that line. Perhaps somehow forcing yourself to devote 10 minutes a week to dedicate to caring for your snakes might prove to be an important lifeline to pull yourself out of a dark hole in the future - again, I am unfortunately speaking from personal experience.

Whatever you decide to do, I really do wish you the very best for the future.
 
I commend you for being concerned for the health and safety of your corns. Do you have friends or family that can take the corns temporarily when you have issues? I would have a plan in mind and hopefully, you wouldn't need to implement it. Many communities have reptile clubs or shelters, and often they have what I'd call foster volunteers. We have taken in snakes and geckos temporarily for friends when they had to relocate. It was one less thing they had to worry about at a stressful time in their lives.
 
Strikealight said:
Another (former?) sufferer here. I would say that the majority have significant psychological issues at some point, but far too few feel able to bring it out fully into the open. I feel for you, I really do - particularly in respect of your fear of a future relapse. Hope you can take some comfort from the warm responses you are getting just in this thread from a number of anonymous strangers. Personally, I have found that although the world can often feel like a cold snd crazy place, there are in fact gazillions of people out there who do care and that they can come out of the woodwork for you when you least expect it.

I know all too well that everyone is affected by these things in very different and often complex ways. However, you clearly care very much for your snakes and so I assume that they give you some comfort and perhaps even some welcome distraction. As such, it seems it would be a shame to lose such a valuable benefit. If having animals in your life really helps you, then I would venture to suggest that snakes are one of if not THE best option for you. Personally, if you end up skipping a feed or two, I can't think there will be much harm done. I think sometimes we forget what these animals have to endure - and indeed are evolved to endure - in the wild. There is a line to be drawn of course, but personally I think the description of your cards shortcomings fall significantly short of that line. Perhaps somehow forcing yourself to devote 10 minutes a week to dedicate to caring for your snakes might prove to be an important lifeline to pull yourself out of a dark hole in the future - again, I am unfortunately speaking from personal experience.

Whatever you decide to do, I really do wish you the very best for the future.
Click to expand...



Peach! Spot on! Exactly!


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Thank you everyone for all of the love and support. I have decided on keeping my snakes! I am going to try my best. You have no idea how much all of your comments mean to me.
 
That is just utterly fantastic news! I really hope that you soon get to a place where you permanently believe that this was absolutely the right thing for you, and that in the meantime those little snakey faces will help to pull you through the other side of any further rough patches. This is surely forum community at its very best - like minded people connected by common interests extending out to each other on a personal level to help someone through the crappier bits of life that beset us all at some points to one extent or another. Rest assured, you will have many opportunities to "pay it forward" by helping someone else in a similar position with the benefit of your own experiences. 'Tis all I am trying to do, after all. Take care of yourself, and the very best to you.
 
Yay! So glad for you, and I wish you the best of luck all around! If you need anything, don't hesitate to reach out! As you can see, there are people here for you! [emoji4]


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