Request: Some sort of way to keep threads on-topic

Paraphrasing allows people to change the facts to suit their new story.

Shiari said:

Well, you did make a statement of terms (wanting heavier moderation) and when that was rejected, a breakdown in relations has occurred.

I hope you enjoy the other forums. This is by far my favorite one.

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Indeed, yet an ultimatum means stating it in advance as a repercussion for not following whatever demands one makes. Imagine the following conversation:

"Hey, Tom, I'd rather not have people smoke at the party tonight. What do you think?"
"If we don't allow smoking, half of my friends won't come, so I'll still allow smoking"
"Okay, I understand. In that case I guess I won't come, cause I can't stand the smell of smoke."

This is pretty much the same discussion we had here. I made a proposal, asked people what they thought, and when it became clear that peole didn't agree I made a statement about rather not using (large parts of) the forum anymore. This is not an ultimatum - this is making a request and responding to the outcome rather than making an ultimatum and executing the "threat" based on the outcome.

In any case, I didn't come here to discuss the definition of an ultimatum. I came here to make a proposal / request, and the proposal was rejected. I'm okay with that as it's (clearly) not my forum and people are clearly happy to use it just the way it is.

Isoldael

Oh, just to add another example of what an ultimatum is, I'll use the same conversation again:

"Hey, Tom, if you allow smoking at the party tonight, I won't come! I can't stand the smell of smoke."
"If we don't allow smoking, half of my friends won't come, so I'll still allow smoking"
"Fine, then I won't come."

Do you see the difference?

Just give it a rest Isodael!
Either leave or stay; it's not changing. Get over it.

Tara80 said:

Just give it a rest Isodael!
Either leave or stay; it's not changing. Get over it.

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Amen to that.

Either you like it and accept it's not going to change, or you move on.

Arguing semantics makes you look ridiculous.

Last word. She haz it.

Just let her. It's easier.

Yep, that's a clear weakness on my side, replying to someone who claims I'm setting ultimatums (which, frankly, would be rude of me to do on someone else's forum) when I'm instead trying to make a suggestion. A suggestion that, in my opinion, would have made the forum a more pleasant place to be. You guys disagreed, and I accepted that and was ready to move on. Instead, I get a bunch of below the belt replies thrown at me for no apparent reason. What I posted here, I posted in good will, not to ruin your forum or steal your freedom of speech or whatever else it might be that apparently made me deserve yet another flaming.

Sadly every forum has its "hot button" topics, which invariably cause controversy and bad feeling whilst getting nowhere. Here they include hybrids, live feeding and cohabbing. Online, it's all too easy to have cross words with good people whom you otherwise like and respect.

As I've been recently reminded here, I'm entitled to an opinion on anything. It's just sometimes more sensible to minimise damage by keeping it to myself.

Seriously, anyone who makes a "suggestion" that has an "or else" associated with it, even attaching the "or else" after they see that the conversation isn't going as they had wished, has made a DEMAND, and not a suggestion. You have stated that you REQUIRE this site to be a certain way, or else you will no longer participate here. THAT is an ultimatum, regardless of the timing of your stating the results of your demands not being met.

Be that as it may, if I might make a suggestion, then. Get you own personal forum here. You would be the moderator of it, and within reason, you can run it however you please.

Otherwise, leave or stay. That is completely up to you. I doubt the world will end either way.