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Happy Chuckday!!!

mike17l

mike17l

Self-Admitted Duckoholic
Chuck Norris is not celebrating his 70th birthday today, the number 70 is celebrating Chuck Norris today.
 
Uh-oh. When Chuck Norris blows out his birthday candles, there's a chance of tornadoes. :sidestep:
 
A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
 
Chuck Norris wears a live rattlesnake as a condom.

On the set of Walker Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris brought a dying lamb back to life by nuzzling it with his beard. As the onlookers gathered, the lamb sprang to life. Chuck Norris then roundhouse kicked it, killing it instantly. This was just to prove that the good Chuck giveth, and the good Chuck, he taketh away.

Happy Chuckday.
 
Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
 
Aw, Happy Chuckday, indeed! I actually saw him last November when he was doing a book signing here in Aggieland. Name of the book? "The Official Chuck Norris Fact Book: 101 of Chuck's Favorite Facts and Stories." Such a cool guy. :}

And two of my favorite facts:

Chuck Norris destroyed the Periodic Table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
 
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