Stupid story on CNN

[Irish Eyes (Mrs.Z)]

Simple. Children should be seen (as long as they're clean and not making faces), and neither heard nor smelled, for the most part .

My children grew up to be respectful adults because they were not allowed to be spoiled brats. I managed to raise them without the use of force, but I did not put up with misbehavior. They learned quickly that unpleasant consequences follow unpleasant behavior, and ditto with pleasant behavior and consequences.

Now that I'm old (50) and my children are grown, I have no patience for other people's screaming brats. I love my own children to distraction--but I could care less about other people's. Train them right, and we have no problems . After all, they'll lead the world someday. It's their parents' responsibility to raise them to be decent & caring adults. Spoiling them rotten will NOT achieve this result.

Yes, I AM a cranky old git tonight! LOL!

 

[o7sugar]

I agree with alot of you, I am the mother of two little ones and also believe that spoiling them and not having any consequences of any kind only reap TROUBLE. It seems many people just don't care anymore...... and they let there children run rampant like wild animals. Where have the please and thank you's gone--at the VERY least!! Little kids are like sponges before the age of 5 is when they learn the most at the fastest rate! They are extremely smart and learn also from what they watch. I am always explaining things to my 3 year old so he understand what's going on and what's expected of him. It's bad parents who give decent and good parents a bad name and unfortunately even well-behaved kids will get a bad rap because of the same bad parents.
I believe some people really shouldn't be able to have children, morals have gone out the window today. I'm not very old (30) but like to think of myself as a girl from some of the older days where parents and kids respected each other and OTHER people!! Treat others as you would want to be treated yourself, and the same goes with putting your children in certain situations. I sure as hell would not want to be somewhere and have a child blantantly be disrespectful and/or crying and having the parent ignore the child, so I make darned sure my kids are respectful.

 

[Outcast]

Oh another thing I think has ruined today's children, TV babysitters. My parents made me go out side for most of the day when I was a kid, the only time I was to come inside was for water and if it was too hot, because we didn't have a swimming pool.

 

[o7sugar]

Oh another thing I think has ruined today's children, TV babysitters. My parents made me go out side for most of the day when I was a kid, the only time I was to come inside was for water and if it was too hot, because we didn't have a swimming pool.

VERY TRUE!! Also gaming "babysitters"!! In our neighborhood there is a girl who rides on a motorized sit scooter!!!! What happend to a good ole bike!!!! No wonder why there is becoming such a problem with child obesity as well!!!! Kids nowadays are spending waaaaay too much time indoors rather than out!

 

[Outcast]

No wonder why there is becoming such a problem with child obesity as well!!!!

You know, that is McDonalds fault... It has nothing to do with the fact that the parents get their kids high fat food and then make them sit in front of a tv...
Now I understand that there are some kids that have issues, but the huge influx of childhood obesity is because of lazy parents letting their kids be lazy.

 

[o7sugar]

Ha haa!! McDonalds!! I forgot about that :roflmao: HUGE problem!! Like I said before, where are the good ole days Anybody have a time machine???

 

[ceduke]

I was just thinking about the last flight I was on...poor mom behind me had in infant with painful ears, and she was trying to get him to breastfeed so his ears would pop. Finally she took a pacifier and dipped it in sugar....he liked it and his poor ears finally popped! Several people complimented her on that. I thought it was a hoot...and a great idea!

 

[ArpeggioAngel]

I have to agree with just about everyone here...
I grew up in a house where you were punished if you did something wrong - maybe a "time out" (before they were called time outs and you just got sent to your room with no tv or anything), or was spanked. And I grew up respecting not only my parents, but anyone older than me.
I was sent outside to play all the time - only in the evenings when it was too dark out were we allowed to sit around in front of the tv. We used our imaginations to make up games and things to do. Even when we first got computers and game consoles - there were only certain times we were allowed to sit around and play on those.

Things have just changed so much. Parents are afraid of disciplining their kids for fear of child services being called on them or they just don't care about disciplining in the first place. Between the constant threat of your kids being taken away and all the psycho-babble about how "more effective" time outs and other "soft" punishment is on kids - no one actually is doing anything to teach their kids right from wrong any more. It is just all coddling and "it's ok" all the time.

No - it isn't "ok" - to kick someone on a plane, or scream your lungs out in a store, or run amok everywhere you go. Have some control over your kids. They ARE children. They require the adults in their lives to give them structure, to teach them morals and values, to show them how not to become overweight, to advise them the difference between what is right and what is wrong and/or unacceptable. Somewhere along the line this seems to have been lost in our culture.

Not to say there aren't exceptions - heck - my best friend gets compliments on her kids everywhere they go because they are the most polite children anyone has seen in a long time. They say please and thank you for everything. They don't interrupt constantly. They wait their turn in line instead of pushing to the front. They don't scream and whine and cry when they don't get what they want. And they are only 11 and 8 - they have been like this since they could walk and talk. Every time I see them I am impressed all over again at what GOOD kids they are - especially since so many other kids I know or run into in public are a nightmare to deal with.

 

[Dinah]

I am totally on board with people trying to have good manners.

Here are my proposals.


As a polite parent

I will ensure that I am a good example at all times not just when my kids are looking.

I will make sure to teach my kids polite manners and try hard to make sure they understand why manners are important. No matter how tired I am and no matter how much I do not wish to deal with crap I will never allow my children to be disruptive to the public nor will I allow them to be rude.

I will teach my children to be aware of their bodies in relation to their surroundings so that their limbs do not accidental swing into strangers. And even more importantly I will teach them how to tell when/where that sort of rough play is appropriate so that they will be able to get that energy out and will therefore be too tired to release said energy unto the unsuspecting public.


As a polite citizen of the world

I will recognize that raising kids is hard and that most of the time people are doing the best they know how, with the best resources they have available to them.

I will recognize that for the most part nobody becomes a parent so that they can do a bad job, and as a polite citizen I will behave toward parents accordingly. I will try to remember that even parents and kids who are ordinarily very enjoyable can have bad days, and in an effort to assume the best in people I will assume this is the case and so I will have empathy rather than anger.

I will remember that parenting is a work in progress and so I will try to give kids the benefit of the doubt.



As a polite person I will not respond rudely to a person (child or adult, parent or non parent) even if that person is being rude. As a human I might think rude things, but I will control myself and keep them private to the best of my ability. I will not hide my feelings but I will remember the very wise advice "A spoon full of sugar hep the medicine go down." And I will find effective and polite ways to conduct myself.



To be honest I really don't see this as a problem of kids not respecting adults now a dayd. The problem is that nobody is respectful of anybody these days. How are kids supposed to learn polite behavior from a bunch of adults that act like beasts all the time?

Most parents believe that the child just wants attention and if they ignore them the child will shut up... Most of the time, they are wrong.

Usually a child wants or craves attention/interaction because they actually need to be attended to....shocking I know who would have though LOL. Don't even get me started on this road or we will end up on a long journey about how Ferber came along and told American's that kids cries didn't actually need tending to, but then for some reason some 'genius' decided that the proper alternative to Ferbers 'wisdom' was to totally cave and be at your kids beck and call 24-7 and to totally cater to their every whim and, how now a days when your kid falls of her bike and gets road rash on her nose everyone gives you dirty looks but...sigh never mind this is the wrong place for this and I do not have the time for the pages I would have to write LOL

 

[susang]

Simple. Children should be seen (as long as they're clean and not making faces), and neither heard nor smelled, for the most part .

My children grew up to be respectful adults because they were not allowed to be spoiled brats. I managed to raise them without the use of force, but I did not put up with misbehavior. They learned quickly that unpleasant consequences follow unpleasant behavior, and ditto with pleasant behavior and consequences.

Now that I'm old (50) and my children are grown, I have no patience for other people's screaming brats. I love my own children to distraction--but I could care less about other people's. Train them right, and we have no problems . After all, they'll lead the world someday. It's their parents' responsibility to raise them to be decent & caring adults. Spoiling them rotten will NOT achieve this result.

Yes, I AM a cranky old git tonight! LOL!

You and me, I have you beat by a year or two ,:roflmao: actually a decade plus two years, I also thin I'm sooooo funny, not.

 

[v_various]

punishment is most often un-needed anyway, just interacting with your kid is enough. Give them things to do! Occupy them!

I'm almost 30 and my mom still reminds me to bring a book and some snacks on long flights : /

 

[ceduke]

punishment is most often un-needed anyway, just interacting with your kid is enough. Give them things to do! Occupy them!

I'm almost 30 and my mom still reminds me to bring a book and some snacks on long flights : /

Hey, I'm 25 and I still bring crayons and a coloring book when I fly, so no worries!!

 

[danielle]

Hey man I like Ferber if it you don't take it too literally,lol Dinah knows what I'm talking about and it worked well for me using some common sense along with it. The bottom line is these days you can't wing down your child's pants in public and give them the whacking they deserve because you do get social services called on you- sad, but too true. My children get a warning, a timeout, and when needed rarely a good old fashioned spanking from yours truly- it works well that way

The thing I think of not to sound sexist is 30 years ago your average mom didn't work full time...or at all. Woman were homemakers, commander in chief of their children, and supported by their husbands. Today your average marriage doesn't even last through a child's elementary years and mothers are working 40-60 hour weeks spending little to no time with their children. I have some reasonably well behaved kids, but I have been home with them for 8 years day and night. They were raised by me not a nanny, daycare center, or babysitter and that makes all the difference in the end. I work 30 hours a week now from 9-3 when they are in school, and I already see a difference. I rush home with them to clean, do laundry, cook dinner, get their homework done, and bathe them leaving 1-2 hours where I get real quality time with them. I am crankier lately, exhausted, and our quality time isn't as quality as I remember,lol Being a parent IS A FULL TIME JOB and if you don't have that full time things begin to slip This isn't an excuse, but rather IMO the true cause of why kids are so much different than we were. If they had just one parent their day and night guiding them, nurturing them, and correcting them when needed behavior would naturally improve.

I also have to add my kids get an hour of tv/video game time a day, and the rest of the time are outside with me and the neighbors playing. However, years ago kids could go outside to play alone which doesn't hold true now. I remember being 5 and allowed to play in our court all day. At 7 I could take off on my bike for the whole day coming back for lunch and dinner, but my kids at 5 & 8 can't go in our front yard without me and honestly I don't know any kids who play outside alone anymore. Moms used to kick us out so they could cook and clean- now moms have to go out with their kids and still manage to keep a decent home with hot dinner on the table each night- thats why kids are so fat because your average mom is too tired to do both and uses the tv or game to keep the kids busy while they do their chores The changes in 2 parent households and amount of time women spend working have negatively affected how children are raised, but I don't think deep dpwn our values really have just our ability to instill them

 

[Teddy Roosevelt]

I think something was lost in translation here. I wasn't proposing that the right way to parent is to let your kids do as they please; in fact I've made posts in the past that point to quite the opposite. Actually, I don't know what the right way to parent is, as I don't have kids. But putting people on the no-fly list for having unruly children? That's asinine, I'm sorry. The author of this article is a self-righteous ninny if he thinks his kids have never annoyed anyone in their lives, or caused people to think HE was a poor parent. If the kids are being especially disruptive or rude, I guess you couldn't really do much as a passenger, unless you have the massive balls Robbie had when he confronted the woman in his story. Frankly, I can't imagine a worse way to spend two hours than facing down a fire breathing she-beast of a mother who now feels she has to defend the behavior of her precious angels from you. And I fly all the time, which is why I can say... it IS possible to make it through those few hours! And then, when it's over, you go to your destination and likely never see that family again!